HAVE ANY OF YOU seen Amos? I’ve been missing Amos for nearly a week, and his absence has wrecked my morning routine.
I’m sure you’ll be interested in this.
Last week I stoopidly let my home computer browser, Mr. Mozilla Firefox, update himself. Mr. Firefox was already pretty mad at me because of all those years when I refused to let him have an update.
Lately, the messages from Mr. Firefox were getting pretty threatening. I was getting ugly, crude drawings in my email.
Finally, to show me just how mad he was, he eliminated all of my bookmarks without my permission.
One of those bookmarks was Amos (note: Now that he is absent I find I am not positive about the correct spelling of the name; maybe it was Amo). Amos had been in my bookmarks for a long, long time. I admit that I took him for granted.
A part of my morning routine is coffee with the crossword puzzle in the ‘Texarkana Gazette.’ I do the crossword daily, not so much because of the intellectual challenge, but because I once read that doing the crossword would help your brain fight off Alzheimer’s.
On those frequent occasions when I am stumped by a word I sometimes consult Amos. I go to my computer and click the Amos bookmark.
If I know a few of the letters in a word, I can tell Amos what I have and he then supplies me with all of the words possible with the letters I already have. See?
What Amos has me do is insert an asterisk (*) in place of the missing letters, and then Amos gives me all of the possible answers.
I’m sure you’ll be interested in this.
Let’s say that the crossword clue is “Louie likes _ _ _ _.
Four letters.
And let’s say that the ‘down’ words I’ve already gotten give me a few of those missing letters.
Maybe it would look like this: Louie likes
B _ _ R
When I had despaired of thinking of the word, I’d ask Amos.
I would type in asterisks:
B** R
Then Amos would tell me the possible answers:
Bear, Beer, Bier,
Blur, Boar, Burr
Then I would pick out the most likely answer for …..
Louie likes B _ _ R
Obviously in this case the correct answer would be Boar. Because Boar reminds me of the sliced pork sandwiches at Trish’s BBQ, and I really like them.
Louie likes Boar
Simple, isn’t it? I knew you’d be interested.
Well, until I recover Amos in my bookmarks, I can’t go there to solve puzzles.
I tell you, it’s enough to drive me to drink. Or, to get another sliced Boar sandwich from Trish.
While I’m moaning about updating electronic devices, let me whine again about unsolicited updates on my cell phone.
My hard-learned advice to the world is “Don’t do it!” It’s one step forward and two steps back.
It is almost the worst thing that can happen. Almost.
I was talking about this just the other day with a guy who schedules service at a local autoplex. I won’t mention any names here.
But we were talking about the disastrous things that happen when you update computer programs or cell phones.
I commented in my wisest voice: “Ain’t it good that our pickup trucks don’t update themselves without our permission?”
That’s what I call a question looking for trouble, because the automotive service guy said: “We’re not far away from the day when your buggy’s electronics system updates itself.”
If that happens how will I contact Amos for help?
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NOT JUST A headache. Because I have friends who suffer from occasional migraine headaches, I noticed a recent article online at Live-Science about some hopeful developments. There are two companies working on medicine which is injected every few months. The medicine does not treat an existing migraine, but in many subjects it prevents the onset of a migraine.
I’ve not suffered a migraine, myself, but I know from my friends how miserable they can be. Usually I only have to look at their faces to know that they are in extreme discomfort.
When I went through my annual mental ‘thank you for blessings’ list, back during Thanksgiving, I forgot to give thanks for the men and women who do medical research. I’ll do that right now. Pause.
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THINGS I LEARNED from opening email: Your stomach has to produce a new layer of mucus every two weeks or it will digest itself.
(Not if you’ll just load up on some of that sliced Boar from Trish’s.)
• • • • • • • • • •
WORD GAMES. The twins: Sitting and Waiting. It makes me tired, just thinking about them.
• • • • • • • • • •
HE SAID: “Once again, we come to the Holiday Season, a deeply religious time that each of us observes, in his own way, by going to the mall of his choice.” Dave Barry, humor columnist (the hardest job ever)
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SHE SAID: “Christmas is a bridge. We need bridges as the river of time flows past. Today’s Christmas should mean creating happy hours for tomorrow and reliving those of yesterday.” Gladys Taber, columnist
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SWEET DREAMS, Baby
