Home Opinion Mine Creek Revelations by Louie Graves: Exhaling body fat

Mine Creek Revelations by Louie Graves: Exhaling body fat

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MY HOW THINGS have changed!

The following Revelation is just a glimpse into how my life has evolved over the last 40 or so years. And it was just a few years ago that one of my buddies addressed the same subject as we dodged work at a local coffee shop.

He gave this example: His favorite publication was no longer ‘Playboy.’ It was ‘Southern Living.’ Me, too. We were both amazed. Some people at the table didn’t believe us.

But things keep changing. Now, one of my favorite publications is the weekly online magazine of Dollar Shave Club. Yes, times have changed.

Some of their humor goes right over my head, but I’ll bet that younger shavers would find those writings hilarious. Some of their humor is too crude for my taste. I TOLD you I had changed!!

Last week, Dollar Shave asked: “What happens to that body fat when we lose weight?”

It took them several pages and lots of scientific words to say this: When we lose weight, the body fat is converted into CO2 by something called ‘ketosis.’ We exhale the CO2 and trees change it back into oxygen.

But, how come trees don’t get fat?

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AIN’T IT BRIGHT! Friday’s full moon will actually be ‘almost’ full on the leading and trailing nights. Most people won’t be able to tell the difference, the sky perfessers say. Of course, here in southwest Arkansas it will be raining or overcast and we won’t be able to see a thing, so it don’t matter anyway.

Cherokees have a name for the June 9 full moon. They call it ‘Dehaluye,’ or Green Corn Moon.

Other full moon nights we can look forward to in 2017:

July 9, Aug. 7, Sept. 6, Oct. 5, Nov. 4 and Dec. 3.

Maybe we will get to see Dehaluye. Go out and count fireflies. Enjoy what planets and stars you can see despite the bright moon.

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ANIMAL CRACKERS.

This really is an ‘Animal Crackers’ Revelation even though it starts out like ‘The Good Earth.’

I decided that, in order to be perfectly happy, I needed just one more plant for my yard. This would be for the forlorn and empty large planter in my front yard. I went out and purchased a nice lantana already with yellow blooms.

I dug an absolutely perfect circular hole in the planter soil, and planted and fertilized the aforementioned lantana absolutely perfectly. This guarantees that the plant will die before July 4th but that’s another story and I’m sure you wouldn’t be interested.

But, in digging this perfect hole I came across a pecan. And that changes this story from The Good Earth to Animal Crackers.

How did that pecan get there? In the planter? Under six inches of potting soil and dead plant debris leftover from 2016?

The closest pecan tree is two football fields away. A squirrel would really be wanting to hide the pecan in order for it to go that far. So, maybe it wasn’t a squirrel.

Then I remembered that crows also crave pecans. Maybe a crow planted it.

In fact, another neighbor — three football fields completely in the other direction — once despaired of keeping hungry crows from raiding his pecan tree. He finally found something that would run the crows off.

He hung a radio from a pecan limb, and ran the outdoor electrical cord over to it. He experimented to find out which kind of music — or which station — would do the best job at repelling the hungry crows.

The whole neighborhood got to participate in his experiment, whether or not we wanted to.

In Neighbor X’s experiment, ‘best job’ really meant worst music and/or worst station. Or, whatever it took to run the crows off.

We won’t go any farther, but X told me that crows didn’t like country music from one particular station in Hot Springs. So there.

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OUR community is blessed to have great people who volunteer time and energy to help their fellow man. I’m thinking specifically right now about all the folks who put their hearts into this year’s Relay for Life.

The threat of rain forced it indoors and participation was understandably down.

While I’m at it, thanks to First Baptist Church for making their hall available for so many community events.

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THE TWINS. This and That. They have a hard time making up their minds. They’re distantly related to Here and There.

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THINGS I LEARNED from opening email: What happens if you get scared half to death twice?

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HE SAID: “You must not lose faith in humanity. Humanity is an ocean; if a few drops of the ocean are dirty, the ocean does not become dirty.” Mahatma Gandhi, peace activist and ‘father’ of India

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SHE SAID: “I was born with a happy heart, and I try to keep a good attitude. It’s not true that I’m happy all the time because nobody is, and we all go through our things.” Dolly Parton, singer

Dolly, did you ever sing for crows?

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SWEET DREAMS, Baby